Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
it was like eating out sand paper
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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