if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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