Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
