How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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