I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
There's even glitter on my cock...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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