I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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