I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
