i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
and she was petting her beer can
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize