Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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