I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
