I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
