you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I'm both gender and math confused
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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