It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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