i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
