He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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