I hate all girls vehemently.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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