So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
