is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Randomize
