It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
