He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
two words...techno handjob
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
