Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
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