And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
