somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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