I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
