He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
