? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
