**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
