Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
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