What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize