You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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