Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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