Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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