I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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