Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
