My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize
