If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
