it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
