Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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