There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
