Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
