So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
