i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
