i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
