do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
