did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
