Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
