.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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