after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
