I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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