Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
the liver wants what the liver wants
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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