Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
